COPING WITH FINANCIAL ABUSE OR FINANCIAL INFIDELITY IN A RELATIONSHIP

Financial Abuse

Financial infidelity

If your money relationship is in shamble and needs help. If your spouse is not sharing the necessary financial stimulus with you, it is very likely that this is one symptom of a troubled marriage. Not sharing financial stimulus with one’s spouse could either be a Financial Abuse or Financial infidelity.

When one spouse is financially controlling (i.e. personally seizes or restricting the other spouse access to cash, resources, and family finances), it is called financial abuse.

It is another way of exerting power and dominance on the other spouse. This has a destructive impact on the marriage.

On the other hand financial infidelity is the point at which one spouse misleads the other about debts obligations, keeping money in a secret account and in any case covers up or lies about cash. Not minding there can still be a sharing of money, assets, and financial decisions.

While financial abuse and financial infidelity can be linked, they are two separate practices. Many relationships can endure financial infidelity; most can't survive financial abuse.

In most relationships, spouses have income disparity, but it does not mean that an individual should have control over the money. If you’re committed to a relationship, you and your spouse owe each other a calm, honest and legitimate conversation about each other’s finances, habits, goals, and anxieties. Money is a very emotional topic for people.

Suggested Solution

If your spouse refuses to work with you on money, you can break the cycle of the abuse. Like any other abuse situation, you need to first understand that it is a problem and need to get help.

·      Read about the cycle of violence and how to end it.

·      Work out setting boundaries and what a marital partnership should be.

·    Educate yourself on the finance of your spouse. If possible, reviewing income and asset   information.

·      Involve a counsellor.

Ⓒ Ebun Olanipekun